Habits and thought patterns (including prejudice and preconceptions) are really handy and give you a sense of safety. A false safety though because they are harmful to us and to others.
Unfortunately negative thought patterns are very common and mass media, focusing on bad news and gossip, play an important role in forming them.
A particular form of negative thought patterns is thinking badly of oneself. This can originate from a number of causes, such as poor self-esteem, trying to adjust to social conventions, making oneself interesting to others, and so on. It is therefore important to identify the cause of your negative thought patterns as soon as possible and release it.
Recipes For Failure
The following are “recipes” to ensure failure:
- “It cannot work!
- “I told you it would end up badly”
- “I’m afraid that….”
- “It serves him/her right”
- “This is illogical”
- “This is the right way to do it”
- “It’s a waste of time”
- “This is not my field”
- “Everybody knows that”
- “Today is a bad day”
- “It will always be like that”
- “People don’t change”
- “I’m sure he/she will say no”
- “Today he/she is in a bad mood”
- “If you really loved me…”
If you decide you will “never think something again”, you will certainly go on thinking about it continuously.
Ignore Negative Thoughts
A key strategy, however, is paying no attention to those thoughts or being humorous about them. What you need to pay attention to is the quality of your thoughts: whenever a negative thought crosses your mind (your own thought or somebody else’s thought) simply acknowledge it is there and “tell” it that you don’t need it and release it with love. Yes, with love: don’t feel guilty because you let that thought cross your mind. Getting rid of your negative thought patterns is a process that takes time. So be patient as you go by, and “pat” yourself whenever you spot a new “weed” in your mind.
Learning To “Unlearn”
Remember that we learn to think since the early days of our life and you can always “unlearn” what you have learnt and that is harmful to you. It happens with many other things such as manual skills, things you have studied at school, foreign languages: if you don’t practice them, you forget about them, you “unlearn” them. The same applies to our thoughts: if you don’t indulge in the company of negative thoughts, if you let them go, you will forget to think about them.
Replacing Negative Thought Patterns
The #1 way of getting rid of negative thoughts is to replace them with new, positive thoughts. Whenever you realize you are thinking negatively, try to rephrase your thought and create a positive image.
Here are some examples:
- If you think you will not be able to complete a task on time, you can think. “I haven’t got much time, so I need to plan my time immediately”
- If you are planning a trip and somebody says:”I’m sure it will rain”, you may reply: “You never know. Weather forecasts are wrong sometimes. However, we could make an alternative plan in case it does rain”.
- And if you have or you plan to have your home-based business and somebody tells you: “You will never be successful”, you can ask exactly why you shouldn’t. Don’t start an argument trying to convince the other person: simply listen to what the other person says and see whether you have not taken into account his/her reasons and maybe adjust your business plan/strategy accordingly. You could also work out alternative plans/strategies and test them to see which one is more successful.
You are the only one who controls your thoughts: you can choose the ones that make you feel well and live the life you want.
If you enjoyed this post and found it valuable, please share it with your friends on Facebook and Twitter. I appreciate it!
To your prosperous thoughts